March 25 - Breaking Up With Fear


"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." - Helen Keller

This November, I'll be 30 years old. This excites me, because I know there's so much life in front of me, and there's a ton of life already behind me. I know who I am now. My identity is in my Creator. I was made in His image. The same God that carved the mountains, set the tides in motion, and holds the universe in the palm of His hand - I was made by that God. His love is wild, and the wonder of His creation is endless.

 

I made a lot of past decisions based on fear and resentment, and I'm done with that. Fear is like a girl I knew in middle school - she just seemed to understand me, so I started spending time with her. We ended up going to the same high school, and she became super clingy. I wanted to leave her, but I really didn't know how to do life without her. We grew up together. So I remained loyal, and of course, she never left my side. But one day I woke up, and I just couldn't stand to be with fear anymore. She was calling all of the shots, and I felt truly paralyzed in every facet of my life.

I didn't know what would happen when I broke up with fear, but I kicked her out of my life, and I told her never to contact me again. She didn't take the news very well. She still knocks on my door at 3am sometimes. She calls me when I'm busy at work, and she tries to turn my friends against me. She says sweet things to lure me back in. She tells me I don't need to change. She tells me to stick with the job that makes me miserable, because it'll be different one day. Fear will do whatever she can to get me to open the door, but I just keep ignoring her. Fear is a crazy psycho, and she'll probably never stop trying to get back into my life. But I've moved on.

Today, I will leave fear in the rearview. I will look ahead toward the unknown, because I know that a new love awaits me.